So, what sort of ‘feminist’ am I?

February 24, 2012

Yes, there’s that word again.

I was extremely grateful for my first male comment – expressing an opinion about how off-putting the word ‘feminist’ can be – especially to male. I want to include males in the conversation (and encourage them to join). The comment got me thinking about how our perceptions influence everything we experience in life. After all, your perceptions and perspective become your reality.

So, what is feminism?

1. the doctrine advocating social, political and all other rights of women equal to those of men.

2. an organised movement for the attainment of such rights for women.

That doesn’t sound so bad, does it?
So why is there such a negative connection to this movement?

The more important question is:

Question #19: Why is there STILL a movement?

I digress.

Maybe the negativity towards feminism is due to that common stereotype of angry, male-hating, bra burning females with hairy armpits. As much as I kind of understand not having to wear a bra (wouldn’t that be nice? Without the ‘girls’ quickly heading south and resting on our stomachs?) or shaving one’s legs and armpits, I think the key word there is angry. That’s what turns people off, I suppose.

But why shouldn’t there be anger, when it’s a question of equal rights?

Equal…not be judged on how similar we are, or should be, to males – but equal.
Equally needed. Equally valued. The yin to the yang.

I am a warrior for BALANCE.

Yes, I’m a [recent] feminist – I started to see. What I see is a world in trouble; tipping badly out of balance.

Yes, I feel a sting of anger towards the unequal place that females hold in our world.

My goal is to use a steady, but strong voice, hoping females join me in exercising their intelligence, to start shifting the current paradigm. I want to use this blog to make females – and males – aware of the saturation of images and stereotypes (in our ‘developed’ world) as well as the horrors inflicted on females in other parts of the world – due solely on their (our) gender.

All adults need to truly teach their daughters and sons – our future – how to navigate through the objectification and violence against females.

We need to empower girls in a diversity of ways – looks and weight being the least important – her mind being the most important.

Our boys and young males are in real danger as well – following a more misogynistic view of women due to the same images and stereotypes splashed everywhere they look. And now, on average, boys are starting to watch violent porn at 11 years of age.
Boys need to be taught to see it as abhorrent to see and treat females in the way they are currently; as anything less than equal.

I do not fight for me. I fight for any human being that is suffering injustice – it just so happens that statistically females are the predominant victims worldwide.

As a female, are you equal in EVERY aspect in your life? If you are, can you say the same for others? How can those sisters be helped? What about the way in which females are being portrayed in popular culture?

Bitch – Nag – Dumb – Useless – Slut – Fickle – Vain – Objectified Sex Kittens.

It’s easy to make females feel down about themselves by labelling them and keeping them in their place.

Question #20: What place do you hold?

I DO NOT hate males. I believe they are important and pivotal in creating a shift of perspective and change in our world – but they are currently running the joint…their way.

One gender in control = inequality.

We need BALANCE to make things right and just. Females ‘ruling the world’ would pose an equally, problematic existence.

50/50 should be the equation of males to females in any room on this planet, making a decision for their people. Nothing more; nothing less.

It’s the only way.

So, that’s the type of feminist I am – a calm and steady warrior, using her voice to get some balance in this wonderful, but absurd world.

Deep Breath


12 Responses to “So, what sort of ‘feminist’ am I?”

  1. MsLJ said

    In any sort of politics, one party does their level best to draw the attention away from the main issue (Any week in Canberra, case in point) and that’s what has been done to Feminism. The distraction of the man hater myth was used to cloud the main issue that a patriachal society is not a healthy one.

    I have always believed that those who thought Feminism was a dirty word (regardless of your gender) were seriously misguided to its purpose. I don’t belive feminism wants to change society to a matriachy, we just want equality.

    I am a Feminist! I wear pants and comfortable shoes. I also wear frocks and heels and make up and push up bras. I love men but I am NOT less than a man. I am also not MORE than a man. I want equal pay for equal work. I want a fair division of labour and family responsility in the home. I want the right to decide what I do with my own body. I do not expect to be objectified and only valued for what I look like. And THAT is what I see Feminism to be. That’s not too hard to comprehend, is it??

    • questionsforwomen said

      Hear! HEAR!
      You’re awesome. *big smile*
      Men know exactly what they’re doing.
      When are women going to step up and DO THE SAME?

  2. I am a man, and I consider myself a feminist. I was under the impression it meant someone who believed in equality. I have met many people who come from underpriviledged castes of society who go a little overboard when re-claiming their equality. It is a natural response, when we are made to feel inferior our whloe lives. Sometimes we react in anger, and choose to reject those who rejected us.

    But unfortunately, that is not a solution. It simply causes more division and hurts the cause of the underpriviledged. Equality is about acceptance. We are all one and therefore all the same. We all make mistakes. We all say stupid things we didn’t mean. We all want to treated with respect. We all want equality. We are all worthy of Love.

    Together we will find the answers, but only together.

    • questionsforwomen said

      I COMPLETELY agree. Absolutely, the only way to achieve change is with a strong, collective stand.
      Unfortunately, the negative aspects of our psyche – greed, power, revenge – seem to always be the victor.
      One day.
      Thank you so much for your comment. It’s great to hear from the boys! *big smile*

      • Greed, power and revenge appear to win because they are the most understood. If we could raise awareness to what Love really is, we could begin to see things change. Love is imagined to be some combination of desire, adoration and sex. Love is thought to be an emotion that springs forth from the heart. But Love is none of these things. Love is the essence, the root, the core. Love is the source of all emotion, good and bad. Love is the lesson, learned.

        Eventually we will come to understand Love, and all of these fears and worries will melt away with the wind. Love cannot be conquered, it can only be experienced. Once we learn how to live in Love and perpetuate its experiences in our life, we will learn equality.

      • questionsforwomen said

        I share your perspective – I just wonder why it’s taking so long to reach. All the negative aspects of live are so deeply entrenched, I despair at times – as to whether it can actually ever happen.
        But with more and more like minded people, like yourself, there is always hope.

  3. lamehousewife said

    I like your emphasis on partnership: men and women need to work as a team rather than against each other. They truly do complement each other and can do beautiful things together if they can just reach that level of respect. Thank you for the post!

  4. jojo said

    why are there fewer women ceos… i dunno, what does the CEO lifestyle look like, 70 hr work weeks? bet it sounds inviting to most women.

    • questionsforwomen said

      That’s a good point – but I guess 70hr weeks aren’t appealing to anyone – female OR male.
      I believe there ARE a lot of women who would like these positions, therefore a rethink and restructure of ‘how it’s done’ is something that could provide a solution.
      It seems that the ‘that’s the way it’s always been’ attitude is truly stopping us moving forward in many areas (like education as well), as present attitudes are so deeply entrenched.
      One thing’s for sure, however, we need more female minds, perspectives and actions to get more balance at ‘the top’.
      Thanks for your comment. 🙂

  5. marie said

    I’ve cured the problem of ‘feminism’ having a dirty name by tagging myself as ‘a feminist who loves men’. this has men drooling all over the internet supporting my rights to equality.

    Feminism should never be about whether we shave our armpits or legs or stop wearing nice shoes or clothes we like… the best way to advance our rights is *with* their support.

    at the same time I don’t want to give the impression we are going to become ‘easy’ just cos we love men. But I find its worth getting them onside before telling them: no we have sex only when and if I agree.

    • questionsforwomen said

      Thanks Marie.
      I am all about balance and we can’t have any progress if men and women are not alongside each other.
      We are not the same, but need each other’s strengths and characteristics to be equally needed and used.
      Hopefully one day…
      Thanks for stopping by. I hope to hear from you again. 🙂

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