Sorry for the heavy title, but a few articles popped up today, that have me incensed…again.

Why? Because the current reign of our ever-present Rape Culture, seeping into every crevice, is simply infuriating me.

The definition of Rape Culture from upsettingrapeculture.com, writes the following:

WHAT IS RAPE CULTURE?
In a rape culture, people are surrounded with images, language, laws, and other everyday phenomena that validate and perpetuate, rape. Rape culture includes jokes, TV, music, advertising, legal jargon, laws, words and imagery, that make violence against women and sexual coercion seem so normal that people believe that rape is inevitable. Rather than viewing the culture of rape as a problem to change, people in a rape culture think about the persistence of rape as “just the way things are.”

This is what it means when people say that sexism and violence against women are “naturalised.” It means that people in our current society believe these attitudes and actions always have been, and always will be.

Just the way things areJust are.

Question #126: Isn’t that the general reason/excuse for indifference?

Infuriating.

I started this post today after I saw the following article regarding the comments made by a Catholic Priest – Father Piero Corsi – in Italy:

Italians outraged by priest’s claim that women bring violence on themselves.

“The title of message was ‘Women and Femicide, How often do they provoke?’

“Father Piero Corsi said scantily dressed women bring out the worst instincts in men and cause violence or sexual abuse. He claimed women end up exacerbating tensions by ‘leaving children to themselves, having filthy houses, serving cold meals, buying fast food and providing dirty clothes.’ “

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Great.

When will ‘the worst instincts in men’ be what attains the pressure from society to change?

No, no, no. It’s us – women. WE have to change…how we dress, how we act, what we say…

But…really…is that what the men in the church (and men in general maybe?) feel is the actual solution?

Will rape and violence against women cease to exist if we stopped wearing plunging necklines?…and stopped providing dirty clothes…and serving cold meals (is that a cold heart too?)…and…and…and…

We all know the answer to that is no.

Hence, we have a Rape Culture.

And yet, if all the rational people think that what’s happening is going down a dark, violent and septic alley, why are we not seeing anything being implemented to stop the continuing, harrowing statistics?

Now I have an even heavier heart due to reading that the poor girl who was gang raped in India, has just died from her injuries.

The following article was a response to the Indian girl’s rape itself, telling women they should carry chilli powder to throw in the eyes of their attacker and not go out at night.

How to prevent sexual assault (no chilli powder required)

Again, GREAT! Anything else for women to do?

This article does have a wonderful list of tips, however, that should actually be used to encourage a change. Tongue-in-cheek – yes – but you get what it’s saying:

Anne Bartow’s Sexual Assault Prevention Tips

1. Don’t put drugs in people’s drinks in order to control their behaviour.

2. When you see someone walking by themselves, leave them alone!

3. If you pull over to help someone with car problems, remember not to assault them!

4. NEVER open an unlocked door or window uninvited.

5. If you are in an elevator and someone else gets in, DON’T ASSAULT THEM!

6. Remember, people go to laundry to do their laundry, do not attempt to molest someone who is alone in a laundry room.

7. USE THE BUDDY SYSTEM! If you are not able to stop yourself from assaulting people, ask a friend to stay with you while you are in public.

8. Always be honest with people! Don’t pretend to be a caring friend in order to gain the trust of someone you want to assault. Consider telling them you plan to assault them. If you don’t communicate your intentions, the other person may take that as a sign that you do not plan to rape them.

9. Don’t forget: you can’t have sex with someone unless they are awake!

10. Carry a whistle! If you are worried you might assault someone “by accident” you can hand it to the person you are with, so they can blow it if you do.

Makes sense doesn’t it?

Here’s an idea: How about it’s NOT women who attempt to stop things, from a defence position; not being allowed to be themselves.

How about governments intervene from a ‘childhood educational angle’?

Tone down the amount of imagery that’s EVERYWHERE, like this:

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I pulled up behind this bus when it was stopped. This is the moving billboard, distracting everyone who’s driving. And where’s the filter for all the developing brains who are taking it all in?

Woman=gagging for it (look at the image)=looove sex=rape.

Question #127: How about implementing a new program in schools? Australian National Curriculum?

We need something. Anything.

Deep Breath.

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A few months back I wrote a post about the balance (or lack thereof) in our lives called – The strong, but stretched, women around me.

Recently I went through – and to some degree, am still going through – a very rough patch with myself, especially in regards to my daughters.

A lot of tiredness from work – both in my place of employment and at home – coupled with less patience and a shorter fuse, meant that things weren’t good.

And the GUILT.

Every time I faltered, I saw any efforts made to change things around (because it had to start with me), go down the toilet.

But my mind is just SO. FULL. It is a rare moment where there isn’t something to organise…coordinate…remind…do

…and from talking to friends of mine, of both sexes, there are a lot who are struggling for some meaning to it all because of how hard it seems to be at times.

In these more desperate moments, I have found myself stepping back and looking at how our society is structured and wondering how (or if) it’s contributing to all this.

Our society is pretty archaic. It hasn’t evolved much.

We have, in essence, been living the same sort of life for decades and besides some changes here and there – like there being more women in the workforce now – we are inherently still chasing the same sort of dream or blueprint to ‘happiness’ as past generations – go to school, get a job, buy a car, buy some type of housing, get married, have kids…and start all over again.

Which lends itself to make us question why we keep repeating the same ‘type’ of life, time and time again.

Even our school system, based on the 50s, hasn’t changed. In a YouTube video called Did You Know?, it states that:

“The Top 10 in-demand jobs in 2010…did not exist in 2004. We are currently preparing students for jobs that don’t exist yet…using technologies that haven’t been invented…in order to solve problems we don’t even know are problems yet.”

It’s gobsmacking, when you think about how technology, jobs and skills are growing at the speed of light – while we obsess about whether our child will ever be a success if they struggle with English, Maths and Science. Watch this following clip about our education system – it will blow you away:

So we’re in a circular, Groundhog Day, style of life that we pretty much pass on to our kids, with a few tweeks here and there.

Question #64: Is it possible to gain the right balance for both women and men in the important areas of our lives?

The following article: A Million Women Are Reading This, is absolutely fantastic!

I think it challenges us to think about the issues that affect all men and women, and whether it’s possible to change for the better – a change that matches the world we currently live in, not one from decades ago, when the decisions of ‘how life should be’ were made.

I’ve touched on a lot of the issues in this article, throughout my posts.

What do you think?

Deep Breath.

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