An important question for men and women. Equally.

July 9, 2012

I have a two-parter today. Women need to see this  – but I really need to get some thoughts from the guys’ end of the fence. Unfortunately, what I’d really like, is to hear some young men’s perspectives, but I doubt they read this blog – so, seeing as you older lads know what’s going on inside a male’s mind, I’d love your opinion AND input as to how we can change things around.

Firstly there is a short going around, similar to Miss Representation, but instead looking at how the sexualisation of the current culture, is developing our future men:

There’s a question in the piece that asks:

“So where do guys get the idea that women are play things, eye candy and sexual objects for our enjoyment?”

As the question is being asked, a scene from a movie is shown, where a stream of attractive women walk in – dressed in lingerie – who then all bend over in front of a male who’s stunned, while the other, Adam Sandler, directs the girls to do it.

So degrading. As a woman, it’s hard to watch.

“The answer is, quite honestly, everywhere.” – they say.

True. It is. It’s at saturation point.

BUT!..and this is where I repeat that I’m not anti-male – you can’t have a stream of women bending over…WITHOUT WOMEN. Without their consent.

So, if our girls are lining up to pander to this heterosexual male fantasy (porn) behaviour and look:

Question #69: What are we, as a society, doing to instigate this?

Can it be changed? Pulled back a notch? Can we (you) stand up and do something to help gain some control of this spiralling problem?

OK – Part two.

A 20-something year old guy started a ‘bed of shame’ idea on Twitter, getting guys to take photos of themselves next to the woman they’ve spent the night with. Click here for article. It was so popular over the weekend – inundated with photos –  that he’s doing it again. Filth.

Question #70: What do men think about the accessibility and ease guys have, to be able to do this to women?

I know what I think about all of this – and I’m sure you have a sense of what I think too…but what do YOU think? About any of it.

Is there a solution?

Leaving it with you.

Deep Breath.


6 Responses to “An important question for men and women. Equally.”

  1. Kristie said

    I am speechless about that artical Paula. How can people have such little respect for themselves and women to post photos like this up. A real disgrace. What type of uneducated morons do this? I really hope that when my children and their friends grow up into young adults that they will have some ethics, boundaries and values regardless of the media’s influence.

    • questionsforwomen said

      It’s terrible, isn’t it? Yes, it’s up to us to educate our kids – but I truly worry – are we enough?
      These fickle beliefs are saturating everything and the proof that it’s having an effect, is in this article.
      *shaking my head in disbelief*

  2. ads said

    What type of people are doing this?

    To be honest when i grew up ( ongoing) i never saw women as a plaything, i saw them as in control. Funny isnt it? I think myself and lots of guys like me saw girls as having the power over men, all guys wanted was yes to get some action, but it seemed girls held the key to that safe.

    I can say that now it seems that girls can be as open with blokes about what they want, and so they should – it seems ( maybe as i get older) more even that way.

    Saying this I totally disagree with the twitter peeps doing that – pretty horrid and I couldn’t ever think i would ever do that.Anyone who does has to live with their faces on the WWW for all time so sucked in to them.

    Funnily enough a girl posted a really good comment on there – saying words to the effect of “Well what do you expect when you sleep with a random” – indeed!

    My message to girls would be to keep that respect and not buy into what guys want. “A man is only as faithful as his options” – Chris Rock – pretty much sums it up for me. Girls should maybe consider getting respect as well as sex from a guy. and guys should bloody well know better than to treat girls like that!!

    I dont agree with guys making preachy videos – it comes across creepy – so keep up the good work you are doing. I am all for equality and i know you are too from reading this blog regularly.

    I think guys are a bit like dogs and girls are more like cats. – work that one out!


    • questionsforwomen said

      Thank youuu! I think your perspective is a common one amongst guys more in their 30s and up. The problem lies in the younger bunch. How do we change their perception? I think the first step truly does lie with women. Girls are too preoccupied with attention and not with respect. Agreed.
      I LOOOOVE that Chris Rock quote and think that it can apply to many areas of life (taking the word ‘man’ out and replacing it with people). I think ‘the carrot’ being dangled for consumerism is leading us down a dark path.
      An awesome comment, Adam.
      PS I don’t really like cats and was born in the Year of the Dog (Chinese Calender)…it aaall makes sense now! 😉
      PSS Yes the start of that video is a tad preachy considering HE treated women that way…oh well, at least he’s doing something different now.

    • Max said

      I ‘d have to disagree with a fair part of that Ads. The problem isn’t women being promiscuous, the problem is women being disrespected for being promiscuous. Women should be free to sleep with who they want, when they want without being judged. Just because a woman “sleeps with a random” it doesn’t justify someone posting her photo on a “wall of shame”.

      • questionsforwomen said

        Very, very true, Max. I’m sure a lot of those girls possibly found out, at that moment, that the guy they were sleeping with is a right fuckwit.
        Women ALSO need to be a little smarter too because some of those guys WOULD have behaved like dooche bags earlier. Surely.
        It’s got to be a two way street of effort to make change happen…however, that Bed of Shame stint was complete shit.
        Thanks heaps for your comment, Max. 🙂

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