Questions for *You*.
October 19, 2014
Just recently I had the incredible honour of presenting at the International Women’s Liberation Summit. It was an enthralling few days, hearing stories from such a rich pool of experience – not all nice, of course, but profoundly unifying.
The biggest issue I explored was the predictable and pedestrian narrative being spewed forth – one that has not deviated much, in essence, since the ’50s [Man = strong, brains, breadwinner, leader; Woman = weak, multi-tasker, housewife, follower] by the media and advertising at a ground-zero level; mainly through the common TV, the medium of choice, consumed by the masses.
My presentation – and my actual main concern with us human beings – addressed the way in which we perceive ourselves and categorise each other into labels; ever-restricting ones. I believe our obsession with labelling, will be our eventual undoing as a species.
It’s permeated every crevice from sex + gender through to race + religious beliefs; from what needs to be ‘tested’ in school to determine a student’s worth (label at the ready) through to perceptions of who a person is just from what job they have, where they live, clothes they wear, what they earn etc – all of which we know is ludicrous and non-sensical but something we sadly participate in (and consume), nonetheless.
The worst labelling by far, is sex; the label that hurts women and girls the most. It hurts us all, actually. We mustn’t forget the boys – because as easy (and true) as it is to say that males commit the most crimes, we must ask ourselves – how did they become the ‘monsters’ we keep reporting they are?
They were taught – just like girls are taught.
As the battle rages over what exactly a woman or man is, our media manages to showcase very strict guidelines as to how men and women are to be represented and perceived – this is the very labelling I want to debunk with our youth. They are our hope of change.
So I started a business to channel my activism toward them.
About three weeks before the Wicked Campers campaign in July, my business was born – to present workshops about media literacy, how we relate to each other as human beings, resilience, consumption and more.
I’ve called the business Questions for You, as the questions will be the springboard toward healthy discussion – using critical thinking.
The central theme – and what I titled my presentation at the Summit – is:
The standard we walk past, is the standard we accept.
I’ll tell you why our young ones are the answer. Recently, I had the privilege of seeing a volume of work, created by students, using film to tell a story. It was such an enlightening experience. I loved it. Some narratives blew me away and others reinforced stereotypes. The point is, however, that I saw a balance. And the incredible part is that I had no idea what sex had created what piece. Logic tells me that I saw sophisticated pieces equally from both males and females; all telling unique stories. This needs to be preserved and nurtured.
Turn to the TV and movie narratives, however, and we see something formulaic and banal. Our youth have the capacity to see beyond this but some need a guiding hand in helping them open their eyes to the ‘product’ they’re being sold – mainly what they’re being taught about each other and ‘how it is’. This sort of language will also be explored in workshops, as well as a lot of the clichés that keep humans bound to restricted perspectives; dealing equally with boys and girls.
Question #211: Does this sound like a program your school, child’s school, business or parents may benefit from?
My website: questionsforyou.com.au is ready for your perusal. Please peruse.
Action speaks louder than words, and this has never been more apparent for me. After 20 years of teaching, I feel a deep connection with our budding youth and have never felt more driven to do something, as I do with this.
I hope you’ll join me in this quest.
Deep, positive breath.
PS: Below is the back of my business card, which was designed by my dear friend Katy Donoghue of Giddy Up Graphics (I’ve known her since we were 7 years old). She rocked it. I do love it so. x 
I’ve changed my name.
January 17, 2014
I have to say that this journey has been cathartic.
Looking back at who I was two years ago and the reasons for starting this blog – to hopefully find answers to the questions I had for myself about this life, why it was the way it was and how I was to navigate through it – along with my daughters, husband, family, friends and the big wide world – it’s quite incredible; I am quite a different person today.
My journey has seen me connect with such an extraordinary cross-section of inspirational and brave feminists – all with their unique angle of what the issues are for women and girls in this world and who work tirelessly to create some positive change.
I feel humbled to have met you all – you have had a profound impact on me.
So here I am – having just had my unoriginal epiphany about the chronic and habitual gender roles both women and men are assigned from birth – and I realised that I had a problem with the name of this blog.
Why did I name the blog Questions for Women? Because at the time, I understood women (and men) to be in categories. I myself (still) participate in it, although some shackles – like how I perceive beauty in myself and all those around me – have been dropped.
But who are these ‘women’ I want answers from, exactly?
Since posting my last question – What IS a woman? (yes, we all know it’s a female adult, I mean in terms of the label) – it became abundantly apparent that, really, there’s no such thing.
So this blog will now be known as: Questions for Us – questionsforus.com
The future can only be changed through our children / younger generation – by Us.
Being the ‘grown-ups’ of the equation means we have to step up – do much more than we are now.
Most of us adults are too far gone in our deeply-rooted mantras and practices to completely change the narrow gender moulds we’ve designed (and keep whittling at into smaller and smaller representations) but kids are different; essentially they are a clean slate.
Today, however, they’re a clean slate surrounded by a world selling them something sinister in its core and wallpapering their existence with it.
Question #197: Can we now embrace the phrase, ‘It takes a village to raise a Child’?
In my heart of hearts, I bloody hope so! We need it now – more than ever.
I sincerely hope to have you on board in discussions, as I don’t have all the answers – but I’m not blind to what I see and will question it.
Deep Breath.
x
We have to unlearn what we have learned.
January 12, 2014
The penny has dropped for me.
It happened last week; the week that saw this blog turn two – a blog that was spawned from the chasm of questions I had about myself and the world I was navigating through with my two daughters. At risk of sounding like a colossal cliché, it was, in fact, my phase as a mother that really drove the creation of the blog…I was starting to lose myself in the label and rubber stamp that is, ‘mother’.
The intention was to engage with others and make some sense of the madness; to dig down to the dark and selfish root system our species seems to be drawing its inspiration from, in an attempt to unpack the question: How did we get to this toxic point in time?
An online discussion with radical feminist, Sister Trinity, saw me reach a pinnacle in my thinking.
The problem is gender; more specifically gender roles and labels.
Before I delve deeper into that nugget, let me explain the angle from which I am coming.
I’m currently engaging in an intensive workshop with my daughters these holidays, teaching them to be smart about the actions they take. From as simple as how to hang a wet towel out to dry, to more complex scenarios – basically everything, really.
I’m teaching them to think of the big picture. Think and be smart; unlock some ingenuity. Narrow the problem down to its core and then take action that’s intelligent. The big picture has to include their fellow human beings (from a starting point of kindness) and therefore actions must cater to others’ rights. It all starts in the home in how we deal with each other and extends out. I am also participating in this little workshop I’ve concocted with the girls.
The A-Ha moment
Up until last week I systematically accepted that men and women had certain ‘characteristics’. Sister Trinity’s words to me, however, finally ignited a long-awaited burst of clarity which resonated succinctly to me:
“There is no ‘female mind’ – sex is physical.
Our bodies shouldn’t define who we are IN ANY WAY.
This is what feminism fights (should fight) for.
The idea that we are born with essentially ‘feminine’ or ‘masculine’ personalities – not just male and female bodies – is deeply offensive; since if you look at what ‘femininity’ stands for, it’s clear patriarchy has assigned the inferior and submissive caretaker role to us.”
BAM!
And we know it’s correct because we know we don’t teach according to ‘gendered’ brains. I am not altering what I’m teaching my daughters (nor in my classroom) due to whether they are male or female – I’m just teaching. As do you.
I still think that nature (which always pushes for procreation) draws man and woman together, but that should be it. Everything else is a construct. An ever-shrinking label of conformity. Everything.
If you’re shaking your head and thinking (as I do at times), ‘But I AM this way through my choice’, I would simply ask you to just ponder how much has really been your choice? It’s not black and white, I know, but it deserves thought. This is not the moment for the discussion of ‘choice’ but we human beings have to agree that we have little choice in our lives – planet wide – when you critically reflect on it…except on how to spend your money, of course.
Nature v Nurture? I think the majority of it, is nurtured.
If life is a complete construct and you’ve been told, since birth, how each gender should behave and more importantly, what it should strive for in life (especially in the capitalist-dripping ‘western world’), then it only stands to reason that gender IS the root of many of the serious conundrums we’re facing today in how we relate and interact – stretching back through a very long and entrenched system. I once heard, on a documentary about genes and how they influence behaviour, that ‘Nature loads the gun and Nurture pulls the trigger.’
To explore even further, my birthday question to you is:
Question #196: What IS a woman?
Really think about this.
Pretty? Dumb? Sexy? Hairless? Mother? Nurturer? Weak? Desperate? Emotional (crying)? Whore? Wants to get married to a man and have babies? Bitch? Can’t make her own money so has to marry a man? Credit card addict? Shopping addict? Likes pink? Squeals if she sees a mouse? Likes housework? Nag? Knows how to get stains out? Multi-tasker?
Whatever you add, these are all simply labels (what gender roles basically are) and countless women will vehemently disagree with being pigeon-holed into these labels because we know that what’s inside us is unique and that the only thing women and girls have in common (in the big scheme of things) is a female reproductive system (functioning or not). All other organs – legs, lungs, heart, brain – the same.
For that matter, what is a man?
The boss? Bread winner? Player? Intelligent? The Man? Powerful? Ruler? Strong? Stupid? Emotional (violent)? Rapist? Detached emotionally? Hates the idea of being ‘tied down’? Under the thumb? Needs a man cave? Handyman? Car hoon? Ejaculation obsessed? Blue wearer? Sports obsessed? Violent video games obsessed? Dickhead? Useless? Pants only?
Same goes here, as above. All constructed labels. The difference is that males benefit greatly from this list in terms of action but suffer terribly in terms of how they get to express (which is very, very limited).
The world we have designed is ludicrous. We have become stupid.
We have allowed this design/system to nurture an obsession with greed and to revolve around giving the penis full privilege in seeking out what it needs to gain satisfaction. Unfortunately it’s insatiable and it’s mainly women (and ever more girls) that they seek.
Whilst the subservient females fulfil their destinies as mothers and housekeepers, they are juggling all the injustices and inequalities that are thrown their way – again only due to their biology.
In short, we are suffocating the true potential of what we can achieve – for all – as a species.
This stagnant construct can change through how we raise our children. To quote Yoda, we have to ‘unlearn what we have learned‘ and give our children a basis that teaches that we all have unique and amazing bodies that provide natural functions and miracles, but it is our mind that can do, be and express itself in whichever way it wants – as long as the basic rights that one expects for oneself, are afforded to the rest.
To practise humanity.
We need to be smart about this.
Deep Breath.
x
Another day at the movies. #2
July 5, 2013
Yes, I had to go again. A friend of mine can’t drive, so I picked her and her daughter up and, together with my girls, we went to see Despicable Me 2. I have to say that I got quite a few giggles from that one.
I told my friend about the pole-dancing ad and we went in to ensure we saw all the advertising from the beginning. I had written to the cinema a few days earlier and wanted to see if some miracle was going to occur and see the ad had been pulled. So again, the curtain was drawn and the screen was blank when we went in.
This time the ad was first up.
As the curtains were opening, there’s all this ‘welcome to the cinema’ fanfare – ensuring everyone is watching. My 6 yr old mentioned her excitement that it was all starting. My 10 yr old said that they were just the ads. Ms 6 replied, “I know, but at least it’s on.” (My kids are obsessed with anything on a screen – regardless of time and place – Aaargh!)…and then BAM! – a woman in stiletto heels, hanging off a pole, is donning the screen. Again.
So it’s not bad enough that they design the fanfare to catch everyone’s attention – they decide to put that particular ad up FIRST? Livid.
A couple (with their two children between them) in the row in front of me looked at each other. I watched with interest, wondering if they were going to communicate to each other the disgust I felt. But the man simply raised his eyebrows at her, smiling – like saying, ‘That looks like a go-er’. She smiled back. Their children, however, were just soaking in those images.
*sigh*
The good news is that the Advertising Standards’ Board has contacted me via letter yesterday and they are taking my complaint to the next meeting. Woooo Hoooo!!
In terms of what we’re seeing at the movies – in my last post I discussed how children are always seeing boy characters fulfil their destinies and dreams.
It’s no different for adults. We only really get immersed in the man’s world.
I took some photos of what’s on offer for us. The first two images came from April when I took similar shots of the predominantly advertised movies.
You get the idea, though…
From yesterday:
Question #173: Isn’t anyone else feeling gender fatigue?
I have been to the movies three times in the last few months. Once in April and twice this week.
In April my husband and I celebrated our anniversary by seeing Jurassic Park in 3D with the girls because my 10 yr old daughter is obsessed with dinosaurs.
The ads for the upcoming movies at the time were, Star Trek 2 (I think there’s only one main-ish female role – the rest are ALL men), Ironman 3 and Superman 72.
So regardless of age, the movies being made seem to only provide the wonderful world of man as its backdrop, with a peppering of woman here and there.
Am I saying – don’t make these movies?
Anyone who has really followed me knows that that is never what I’m about.
But a more balanced representation of this life – which harbours 51% of women?
YES! Yes to more about us, please.
We are fairly awesome, after all.
Deep Breath
x
A day at the movies.
July 3, 2013
As I stepped into the cinema complex – it was utter chaos.
School holidays. What a nightmare. Kids everywhere – excited – and asking for everything.
I took my 10 yr old, her school friend and my 6 yr old, for a stint at the movies, to see Monsters’ University.
The cinema was full to the brim of super-energized children and their parents.
Nothing was on the screen at this stage.
It’s funny that when you go to a kids’ movie, you tend to get there early.
Why is that? So loud. Kids kicking into the back of your seat…
The first ads started to roll out – the still-photograph ones – promoting the local area.
To my horror, one of these ads was for pole dancing classes, with images of women dressed as strippers – one hanging upside own with her legs completely spread apart.
Behind me, two 7ish yr old-looking boys exclaimed, “Whoa!”
All the while girls and women are being told, it’s great exercise!
So why not in sports’ gear?
Bollocks.
It’s grooming girls and boys. It’s Porn Culture.
So that was Gender Studies Lesson #1 for a lot of the children in that cinema.
Did they all see it? Or get it?
Who cares.
The two, 7 yr olds behind me certainly felt a reaction that their brains computed and filed somewhere, and I know my daughters saw it.
I was gobsmacked. It almost feels like they’re taking the piss.
Then we came to the ads for future kids’ movies. Coming soon!
- Planes (from the makers of Cars) – animated scenes from Top Gun in the ad. Boy planes talking about other boy planes.
- One about a snail (a boy) who wants to be fast and his dream comes true (fancy that). That one’s called Turbo.
- Smurfs 2 with ONE female – who needs rescuing from all the men.
- And a behind-the-scenes movie following One Direction around their world tour.
This leads us to Gender Studies Lesson #2: Almost all children’s movies will be about boys, leading boys fulfilling their destinies and boy worship.
Not girls or women. They can only (generally) be a support to helping him.
Yes – we did have Merida from Brave and what a wonderful, sassy, girl she was. I say ‘was’ because Disney are now remodelling her to look more ‘princess’ like, with a smaller waist, big doughy, cat-like eyes with long eyelashes…see below *sigh*
Left = After – – – – – – – – Right = Before.
It feels hopeless. They give us a wonderful story about a brave girl and her relationship with her mother (of all things) and then take it away again by wrapping her up in Barbie.
And then there was the actual movie, Monsters’ University. It was good in parts – it was about boys, boys, mateship, boys, boys, brotherhood, boys, boys, teachers…and one dominant female role – the meanie Dean of the University. Witchy like, but who was the best ‘scarer’ of her time. Can’t have it all (be the best AND nice), like the boys.
When we left the cinema, I did chat to the girls about why we keep seeing children’s movies that are SO male heavy and what ‘type’ of women/girls we all – boys included – soaked in.
In the few hours of our cinematic journey, the female representation we observed, was as follows:
- Ad: Stripper – sexual pleasure machine
- Upcoming movies: The only substantial amount of girls seen, in only one of four trailers aired, were screaming out their undying love (male worship) for the cookie-cutter boys of One Direction – the other needed rescuing.
- Movie: A secondary role of a mean, witch-like Dean of the University
- Movie: An even lesser role of a mother, in curlers, a mu-mu and doing the laundry
- Movie: There were some all-girl frat houses, but collectively were on-screen for about a minute.
That’s it.
I honestly can’t convey my disappointment.
Boys are so fortunate to see the same positive reinforcement over and over again – showing them how to tackle problems with the brotherhood…
Question #172: Where are the movies for our girls? Where are their role models?
And another thing – even though it could be done without it, they didn’t use the opportunity to use the plural possessive apostrophe after Monsters in the title. The perfect chance to teach everyone its use – like for Mothers’ Day.
So no grammar lesson for the kiddies either.
Deep Breath
x
PS I lodged a complaint with the cinema and the Advertising Standards’ Board. I’ll keep you posted.
Question #159: What is so wrong with crying?
May 22, 2013
This is a question I have battled to answer my entire life.
Well, battled may be too strong a word – but it has certainly plagued me throughout my youth and was not until about six years ago that I started to understand my personal love/hate relationship with this mode of expression – mainly due to the stigma that’s attached to it, by the ever-watchful eyes of society.
It fills me with indignation.
As I child, I grew up being a ‘wog’ in a predominantly Anglo location. On many occasions I was bullied because, even though when you looked at me you didn’t see an ethnic girl, I spoke Spanish with my grandmother when she picked me up from my primary school. This, in turn, meant I was fair game to all those who hated themselves and needed to feel better by picking on someone – me.
Although I know NOW, as an adult, why bullies are bullies, what this did to me as a child was to start me on the path of being very, very insecure – desperate for acceptance and belonging. It also awakened the ‘cry-baby’ in me.
This was compounded at home whenever my parents, especially my father, expressed anger towards me when I was a teenager. Although it was probably no different to any other parent/child relationship, whenever I heard that particular unsatisfied tone, I would instantly feel the knot shoot up into my throat, as I desperately tried to hold back the tears – knowing that their arrival would open a new kettle of fish.
Weakness.
Society tells us it’s a sign of weakness.
WHY?
I wonder whether it’s because men are were seen as ‘strong’ and the ‘providers’ – Me Tarzan; You Jane – and men DON’T cry. Well, if being a male is the benchmark of existence and crying is seen as a negative weakness, then what is the males’ counter-balance? How do they let off their feelings of disappointment, frustration and, dare I say, vulnerability?
Violence?
It certainly appears to be a (too) common, ‘manly’ way to express emotion.
Question #160: So if we’re not supposed to cry – what then?
Laughter is considered an important and essential part of our emotional well-being and if balance is to be achieved, surely crying must play an equally paramount role. It’s greatly concerning that this is marred by the ridiculous notion that crying is a no-no and that we all need to ‘man up’.
Man up? No thanks.
Men should cry more.
Crying can represent a myriad of positive things – compassion, empathy, sympathy, joy – why must these traits be snuffed out? And before people start arguing that they’re not, please understand that females (the predominant criers, due to the conditioning that says it’s a part of our DNA – bollocks!) are always being told to be the ‘compassionate and sensitive ones’ – UNTIL WE ARE – then it’s criticism all the way.
Tori Amos said the following:
My epiphany (six years ago) happened when I experienced some difficulties with work, coupled with some post-natal depression. I was crying a lot.
My doctor referred me to a psychologist, whom I only saw three times. In that last session, I had decided that I was only rehashing the negative feelings about my issues and that I simply wanted to take some action. The only problem was that as strong as I am on the inside – and I am – I always ended up having tears in my eyes when discussing frustrating issues with people and was crippled by the thought of being perceived as weak, even though I knew I wasn’t.
She said to me, “Maybe deep down, you think they’re right.”
A-HA moment. Right there.
Due to the decades of entrenched perceptions about what crying entails, I ended up in a Catch-22 state of affairs – believing the hype about what it communicated about me to those I was talking to…which ended up the crux of why I cried in those situations.
Great.
Well, now I’m happy to say that I’m still a crier (just not like before) and that it’s always done wonders for my skin! I let it out when I need to, purge myself of the toxins and am not ashamed of it.
Not one bit
I cry for injustice, for hurting fellow human beings, for our dying planet, for loved ones and I also cry tears of joy.
Better than punching a wall, I say.
Deep breath…and let it aaalllll out. You too, boys.
x
Use-by date by 40? Or Best Before?
January 20, 2013
Question #138: Why is ‘young’ the only flavour on offer for women?
I am a 42 year old woman, just shy of my 43rd birthday, and I have a huge problem with the way females negatively discuss their age around the start of this decade. There is little doubt that the money-crunching wheel out there has had a lot to do with this toxic epidemic, as it’s at this time where a woman’s invisibility occurs in her representation – once she hits her ineffectual use-by date. 40.
Even if women see themselves as ‘Best Before’ 40 – it’s still a completely disheartening state of affairs. That’s a lot of sad females not reaching their amazing (and needed) potential in this crumbling social world, at the midpoint their lives.
From the article – The mysterious case of the disappearing women – comes the following:
“Try climbing through higher education, motherhood, self-employment, years of self-improvement, gyms, diets, abstinence of everything enjoyable – from ciggies to Magnums to suntans – to selflessness, to finally reach the summit of womanhood, fit, exultant and ready to fly – to find . . . a generational wipeout,” she ruminated in a column in The Sun-Herald.
“Visibility: zero. Scream ‘Where the bloody hell are you?’ all you like, but don’t look to the movies, the media or airwaves because, aside from Gillard, Germaine on Adam Hills in Gordon St Tonight the other week, glimpses of Jenny Brockie and Jennifer Byrne, Kristin Scott Thomas and Juliette Binoche buried deep within the bowels of a French film festival, there’s barely anyone out there who represents my age group.” Ouch.
Ouch indeed.
The documentary Miss Representation, disclosed statistics showing that although women aged 40+ comprise a large chunk of our gender, we are microscopically misrepresented in the media – especially in film.
What we are being saturated with, are images of women in their 20s – generally looking perky and ‘hot’. The damage this does to our developing young girls alone, is something that should inspire us to act in a more positive light towards our aging bodies. But no.
Even though women in their 30s are still attractively visible – there’s no denying that it’s the decade when it all starts to trickle down to being transparent. The irony is that many women who are in the limelight, struggle through that decline kicking and screaming, disfiguring their faces with injections and surgery, only to still end up on the ‘too old’ scrapheap. Double irony? Their male counterparts are doing just fine in their (generally) natural, greying and lumpy selves. And they don’t look freakish.
It’s been said a million times (which just imbeds that frustration in a bit further) but this is happening because a woman’s true value and efficacy is being packaged to solely be attached to her youthful glow and, in turn, her sexual allure. Can’t be older AND be sexually attractive! Goodness me. That’s simply not possible.
My eyes! My eyes!
Doesn’t it infuriate women to know that even though they spend billions on ‘improving’ themselves (just like they tell us to), it hasn’t afforded them any more airtime?
How sad that for many females, in this time when they are truly coming into their own skin and really start to understand who they are; where they want to run out onto the street and toss their hat up in the air like Mary Tyler Moore – is the exact moment society doesn’t want to know. I found myself feeling vital and energised when I turned 40, in many areas of my life and I know that there are many, MANY women who feel the same – so where are the tales of my fellow sisters in the same proverbial boat?
It would be simply marvellous to actually hear the stories of women’s life experiences – with a spectrum of what’s possible – not just witness the same narrative over and over again, where the story is about the male and his destiny and the young and ‘gorgeous’ girl chases guy for love (or support), or worse still, we actually DO see the wonderful achievements of women, only to have them be overshadowed by her outfit or cellulite issues.
We’re ever so much more.
I would also like to strenuously point out that if, on average, we live to the age of 80:
Are we really saying we’re going to be depressed for HALF our lives about our age?
>>>> Half our lives?? <<<<
Surely NOT!
Embrace the magnificent being you are and get out there and enjoy those next 40 years! That’s an order.
Deep Breath.
x
A Woman’s Thoughts about Women (1858)
January 14, 2013
For Christmas, I received the truly magnificent, original book I called: A Woman’s Thoughts about Women by Dinah Craik – published in 1858.
The cover is barely holding it together (I feel like Indiana Jones handling a priceless artefact), but the words are strong and beautifully expressed. I find myself raising my eyebrows and shaking my head a little as I read her thoughts, confirming the notion that little has changed in at least 150 years.
This is disconcerting, to say the least. I have always intimated that people have essentially stayed the same ‘on the inside’, but is that changing now with our ever-shrinking world? One that has lost its ability to protect us against the saturation of opinion?
At least this is one person’s opinion I am interested in.
There are so many issues that I want to share form this book and lifestyles from a bygone era, that’s it’s hard to know where to begin. Flicking through, I landed on the chapter title that resonated with me: Women of the World.
Dinah writes:
‘What will the next generation come to? What will they be – those unborn millions who are to grow up into our men and our women? The possible result, even in a practical, to say nothing of a moral light, is awful to think upon. Can it not be averted? Can we not – since, while the power of the world is with men, the influence lies with women – can we not bring up our girls more usefully and less showily?
Can we not teach them from babyhood that to labour is a higher thing than merely to enjoy; that even enjoyment itself is never so sweet as when it has been earned? Can we not put into their minds, whatever be their station, principles of truth, simplicity of taste, helpfulness, hatred of waste; and, these being firmly rooted, trust to their blossoming up in whatever destiny the young maiden may be called to?’
A woman after my own heart.
Better still, her words can equally be applied to our young boys – all people, really.
What simple, logical and fantastic guidelines to live by.
Question #135: So what does the future hold for us, knowing the same questions were being asked 150 years ago?
If we envision dark days – can it not be averted? Evidence seems to point to the gloomy fact that no, it can’t. I long for a time when we can look back at our ridiculous notions of gender roles and see that they have (in the long run) made us worse and more pigeon-holed than ever. Males in power; females on show and all that’s in between.
I wonder what Dinah would think of today’s state of affairs…how intriguing would that conversation be?
Deep Breath.
x
Dinah Craik
Questions for Us 