Perfectly asked – Abortion #3.
September 13, 2012
The image above comes from an article called – Pro-birth, pro-life or pro-choice; a very simple question – and it states:
Once a child is born, it has needs that can include anything from medical care, food, shelter, adoptive services, various support services and clothing. Cuts in support systems for low-income women and children seem to contradict the pro-life belief system. Cuts in many programs that help provide care for these children have come under attack as the GOP pushes for “no new taxes” and cutting current spending. It seems that those who are the most vulnerable are not exempt from the pending cuts and this ties directly to the quote made by Sister Joan and begs the question: If you are pro-life, shouldn’t your concerns exist beyond the womb?
It is extremely hypocritical to pro-choice advocates to see pro-life advocates pushing for restricting a woman’s right to choose what happens to her own body in one breath, then pushing to restrict tax dollars from being spent on necessary services to the poor in the next. It appears on the surface as if a woman who is forced to bear a child – whether conceived from rape, incest or other causes – she is then left struggling to find a way to care for the child with no help from the GOP.
Pro-life advocates have decided that in order to push their personal agenda on poor women, they will prevent them from having access to birth control, possible life-saving services and medical care by restricting and sometimes even defunding family planning. This leaves these women with no options. This has created rage and anger.
This leave only one final question: Are you pro-birth, pro-life or pro-choice?
Question #94: Which one are you?
Deep Breath.
x
PS – Actually, I’d like to end this post with a giggle. My friend Jacquie and I, were having a laugh about this Monty Python clip from The Meaning of Life, earlier today – because sometimes, you’ve just got to laugh!
WANT MORE?
HAHAHAhahahaha!! Good stuff.
Question #91: Doesn’t this infuriate you?
September 10, 2012
The following information comes from The Sydney Morning Herald (September 2 – Fathers’ Day):
“Women must work an extra 64 days each year to earn the same as their male colleagues, new figures show. The pay gap has also widened in the past year, prompting calls from the trade union movement for legislative change…
…On average, men earn 17.5 per cent more than women in comparable jobs.”
Come ON…
This information appeared next to an article about Alan Jones’ comment:
Alan Jones let rip a tirade on 2GB against Prime Minister Julia Gillard. This time it was about her promise to help get more women in the Pacific into parliament and other decision-making positions. Gillard argued raising the status of women was the best way to reduce the appalling domestic violence statistics in the region.
Jones didn’t agree. He claimed that, “Women are destroying the joint – Christine Nixon in Melbourne, Clover Moore here. Honestly.”
He then said, “There’s no chaff bag big enough for these people.” He has also previously said our Prime Minister should be put in one and thrown out to sea.
Such malice – and for what?
Let me just say – GOOD ON YOU, JULIA! There is nothing wrong with that wonderful vision for our sisters in the Pacific.
How interesting that a man like Alan Jones – who has the luxury to spread his poison over the airways, should find offense to this. How exactly is HIS life affected by this promise?
Does Alan Jones really give a rat’s bum about any of us? Obviously not, ESPECIALLY if you’re a woman…Oh, unless you listen to his show.
Federal Attorney-General Nicola Roxon responded by branding the Jones comment “good old fashioned sexism”.
Well it is.
But as the film Miss Representation pointed out – why would girls want to become a voice in our governments, when they are treated with SUCH contempt?
Fortunately, Jane Caro (awesome activist who wrote the above article) has started a small stir by creating the hashtag #destroyingthejoint – there’s also a FB site of the same name, although I’m not sure who started that one.
Who cares. It’s a chance to say that it’s simply NOT. ON.
More women in government – equal representation! Equal pay!
But as I’ve always said, it starts with us because men vote for men and women predominantly vote for men too. That’s not to say just vote any ol’ gal in – but our mindset has some changing to do.
You may not like Julia Gillard, but this promise is a wonderful one and we should all acknowledge it – not just oppose everything.
Deep Breath.
x
PS I posted this on my Questions for Women Facebook Page but it wouldn’t hurt to put it here too. There is a petition with Change.org asking for Alan Jones to apologise for his mysoginist and sexist comments.
Click here and have your voice heard!
A serious double whammy.
September 8, 2012
The United States continues to be in the throes of debate…and all over women’s bodies. Again. With men in politics voicing their opinions about women’s bodies. Again.
They seem to be in a political fervour and the latest CORKER comes from a Republican named Todd Akin.
In the article Todd Akin, what exactly is ‘legitimate’ rape?”, Akin is quoted, in his attempt to fortify his anti-abortion stance, as saying:
“It seems to me first of all, from what I understand from doctors, that’s really rare. If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down.”
Speechless.
When we find ourselves turning to a panel consisting of a majority of men, to determine the rules as to what women are allowed to do with their bodies – there’s something terribly wrong.
At the start of the year, I went to see Eve Ensler speak and she had this to say to Akin:
Dear Mr Akin, I want you to imagine…
If I can add a little spin of black humour to all this, watch the following clip:
Although we may laugh – it simply allows us to cover over how despondent we truly feel.
Now. What do I think about rape.
I know that the majority of women have either experienced rape, sexual assault, inappropriate touching and a gazillion other situations. The fact that the stories are literally ENDLESS has to say something about our culture. OK, so it’s not a new phenomenon, BUT you cannot deny that the representation of sex in the media and the saturation of porn, is having an ever more detrimental effect on our developing youth. The cases of rape to girls under the age of 12 is staggering – the film Miss Representation put the percentage at 15%.
I recently spoke to a male parent I know and he said he had to throw out a game his teenage son was playing (which he attained from another male friend) – where you got bonus points for rape.
BONUS POINTS FOR RAPE. It made me feel sick when he told me…as well as so helpless for our kids. I’ll be honest, there’s a tinge of despair as well.
1 in 6 have experienced rape or attempted rape. I am one of the 1 in 6 (attempted).
I had a guy I had not even spoken to at a university party, follow me to my college room – chit-chatting on the way. I used to collect Coke bottles and memorabilia and he feigned an interest, walked into my room and locked the door behind him. He told me that it would just take a second and that he didn’t want to have to get rough. I knew that I wasn’t a match physically, so I acted like it would be great, but that I wasn’t feeling up to it. He pushed me down on my bed by the neck a few times as well as try to take off my top. Luckily for me, I managed to get out into the corridor where he got (verbally) very angry, but we were out in the open, so I was spared.
I have never been more terrified. Just because he didn’t actually rape me, doesn’t mean that I didn’t experience pure panic inside.
But you know what? When word got around, people started to take sides – because he was a ‘nice guy’. I hadn’t even spoken to him at the college party – not a word. And yet, judgement was made against me.
ENOUGH!
Enough judgement.
Question #88: Why isn’t more being done to STOP rape – rather than working out what is or isn’t classified as rape; or what the woman did or didn’t do?
I read a phrase that says – “Don’t compare your life to others; you have no idea what their journey is all about.”
Which brings me to other point in this debate – abortion.
It’s none of my business what a woman decides for herself. I DONT KNOW HER STORY OR SITUATION. If we are so naive as to think that the majority of women take the decision lightly – then we’re believing an illusion that’s been fabricated.
The majority of women who have abortions are already mothers, who simply cannot support another child.
I have seen teen girls overseas begging on the streets because they can’t afford the child they (may) have been forced to keep. Is this child really going to be the next Einstein? Or is it more likely that it will live a life of misery, abuse and/or poverty?
“Every woman should be empowered and have the right to determine when she wants to have a child. The right to own her future and provide for her children’s futures. The right to participate freely and equally in society.” (via UPWORTHY)
The bottom line for me is this:
Question #89: What about the WOMAN’S life? (the one that’s already established)
But in terms of The United States and their heavy anti-abortion stance, it’s curious – as my friend Jane said to me – that for a country that’s so pro-life, they are also pro-guns and pro-war. (Not ALL of course, it just how they’re perceived). I’ve always seen it as absurd and surreal, that anti-abortionists, want – and do at times – kill doctors…
*shaking my lowered, saddened head*
Deep Breath.
x
Just vote. Sign your name. It’s simple.
September 2, 2012
In light of my last few posts – if you want to start making that change, sign the following petition to Cleo Magazine – strongly urging them to stop altering the images of women they use.
Following a US teenager’s successful petition calling on 17 Magazine to publish one unaltered photo spread per month, Melbourne woman Jessica Barlow has created a petition calling on Australian Cleo Magazine to do the same.
The petition reads:
Reality is beautiful. Stop using Photoshop to alter appearances.
In high school, not a day would go by without hearing another girl complain about her weight or appearance. I saw girls get severely bullied and excluded because they didn’t live up to the beauty ideals of women in magazines.And it made me want to doctor my own appearance even more.
My friends and I looked up to the models in Cleo magazine. It was one of the most popular among my classmates. But what I think many of us didn’t know is that Cleo was altering the images of women to make them skinny and blemish free.
The altered pictures make readers question their weight, appearance and self-worth. I know this much first hand. They teach us that to be “pretty” you have to be thin and have perfect skin. Studies now show that these damaging images can lead to eating disorders, dieting and depression.
Distorting and editing the appearances of models in magazines is distorting the mental health of girls who read magazines that engage in these practices.
Public pressure is building across the world for magazines to stop altering images of girls. In the US a teenager convinced Seventeen Magazine to publish one unaltered spread a month after thousands joined her petition. I think Cleo should do the same for their readers.
I want Cleo to stop selling images that hurt girls and break our self-esteem. Let us see real faces and real shapes in at least one photo spread a month — and always put a warning symbol on any image that has been altered.
It’s time to put an end to the digitally enhanced, unrealistic beauty we see in the pages of magazines. Please sign my petition to Cleo Magazine editors calling on them to give us images of real girls in their magazines.
PLEASE sign. It’s quick and it’s the first step in having a voice:
You can also tell them what you think, by writing a rational, intelligent comment on their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/CLEOAustralia?filter=2
Lastly, you can check out the following page:
https://www.facebook.com/#!/events/440832622636296/445479898838235/?notif_t=plan_mall_activity
Let’s do this thing!
Deep Breath and sign against covers like the following cartoon:
x
DON’T buy into it. Yep – it’s a Shout Out. #4.
September 2, 2012
I’ve had an epiphany – a bit of an ‘a-ha’ moment. Well, it wasn’t so much that I didn’t know it before, but more that I was hit with a simple and succinct realisation.
It’s the simplicity of it that is both liberating and equally terrifying – because regardless of its clarity – we are trapped.
You know all the famous modern icons? – I can’t believe what we call them ‘icons’ for – icons like Kim Kardashian?
We’re paying them.
In turn, they spend the money we give them on ‘perfecting’ themselves:
On make-up – THEY DON’T PAY FOR.
On clothes – THEY DON’T PAY FOR.
On ‘procedures’ – THEY DON’T PAY FOR.
Cars – Technology – ‘Gift Bags’ – EVERYTHING!…they don’t pay.
We do.
And then we worship them for creating the image we can never have (as I wrote in my penultimate post Why it’s worse now) and buy more beauty products, clothes, ‘procedures’ to try to replicate it. In turn, we keep fattening their pay packets, as the beauty industry uses them over and over again – making them icons.
THIS IS PURE INSANITY!
This vicious cycle is not only never-ending – its predatory qualities and hunger appear to be insatiable.
OK, here comes a Shout Out.
We are intelligent beings, ladies – VERY intelligent:
Question #87: So why are we doing it to ourselves? WHY?
And we are doing it from both sides – one side (the majority of us) perpetuate it by BUYING into this mono; limiting; ‘hot’ look, while on the other side, we also have the women who agree to represent us so poorly and participate in our exploitation that way.
It’s a trap.
As a fly is digested slowly in the Venus Fly Trap, so are we.
I don’t know about you, but that’s why this clarity is a tad terrifying to me – because its EFFECTS are devastating. Statistics are showing girls and women spiralling into a world of depression and worse. I even know many mothers who loathe their bodies after growing a human being in them – instead of wearing their shape with a pure sense of pride – of the miracles their bodies are.
But, as I said in response to a comment from the above-mentioned post, EVERYTHING IS TAUGHT. Everything.
So it’s time. Regardless of what’s happened in the past – the only way to move forward is to say, “OK, yes, we used to do it like that or accept things as they are – but not any more.
Do not pay any attention to women like Lara Bingle, who so graciously had the following picture of herself taken (which has also been photoshopped to an inch of its life):
…because as I’ve said to my students at school – ANYONE CAN DO THAT! Anyone can have sex. Anyone can take their clothes off. It’s not a difficult thing to do…and yet we end up rewarding women for doing just that??
The challenging and hard thing is NOT doing it the easy way – through shortcuts – as there’s always a price to pay…
…and ain’t we paying for it now!
The irony being that the money from our pockets, provides the funding for more.
I repeat: Why are we doing it to ourselves?
Deep Breath everyone – it’s going to be a bumpy ride.
x
Why it’s worse now.
September 2, 2012
I was cooking and my 9 year old daughter was keeping me company, chatting. It was great.
Yesterday, when I let her play on the computer, which is normally some sort of simple game, I went in to find her doing a ‘make-over’ on some cartoon girl. I told her to get off it. She didn’t make a fuss. Bless her.
So we were chatting about that tonight. I said that, in a way, that game was training her to become a girl who grooms herself in a particular way. I said that there was nothing wrong with wearing makeup when she’s older, but that girls and women nowadays were spending A LOT of money to look a particular way.
I said to her that when I was younger, I loved going through women’s magazines but that ‘back then’ the images were of the women as they were. Don’t get me wrong, we were being sold a particular image – thin, glamorous, in the latest looks…thin – BUT they were fairly real. No airbrushing…lots of make-up – but no airbrushing.
Throughout these modern times – since mid-last century – women have always been sold a look; in line with the fashion of the time. And we have always jumped on that wagon, hoping to mirror that look and belong. That’s cool. We are the fairer sex and we like to groom ourselves.
But it’s worse now.
Why? Because the looks and bodies we’re trying to mirror – are altered and unattainable ones.
Simple, isn’t it?
The logic of it is striking and obvious – and yet…
…here we are ladies – watching women on our screens, posters, ads – depicting the shangri-las of looks – that we can’t have because they are simply. not. real.
Question #85: Why is the unaltered image above, not considered beautiful?
Because there are some rolls…like the ones we all have? Because she has a tummy…like most women?
God forbid we represent the general female population in our media!
Now look at the women around you – your friends – your family.
Do you think they’re all ugly?
They must be if they’re not thin, ‘hot’ and sexy…with no wrinkles etc. etc. etc.
But the majority of women DO NOT fit that tiny mould and I’m also pretty sure that you don’t think any such thing about the women in your life. So, if we think the ordinary and remarkable women around us are beautiful:
Question #86: Why are we being passive and tolerate what the media is doing to the representation of women?
And we are being passive.
Just look at what’s been done to the images of the women below – for magazines that women buy:
Even Barbie – or any doll for that matter (Bratz, anyone?) – sells a look to girls from a young age.
It’s up to us to change this. Noone else can do it – certainly not men. That would be as futile as women changing men’s perspectives.
It’s up to us.
Deep Breath.
x
Just Sayin’ – #9
August 25, 2012
As much as the hype over The Shire seems to be abating (I’m not sure what their ratings are like at the moment), it seems ludicrous that the types of people who media feel we need to ‘follow’ are people like this:
Shire star charged over gay attack
When producers of TV shows like The Shire sink to the lowest sludge at the bottom of the bucket to create ‘entertainment’, I just wonder one thing:
Question #83: Who are the bigger fools? Those who create the show or those who watch it?
Why is a man who has urinated on another in a homophobic attack, given the platform and reverence (by some) that TV affords them?
WHY?
As always, though, we do have a choice as to whom we give our prized attention. Let The Shire sink into its own excrement.
…Just sayin’.
Deep Breath.
x
A hairy moment.
August 14, 2012
It’s time to get a little more light-hearted; time to have a bit of a giggle.
So here we go…Female Body Hair – mainly of the leg variety.
I am of South American background and have been a fairly, hairy human from when I can remember – well, my legs especially.
I recall the serious discussion with my mother and grandmother, looking up between them, as to whether I was old enough to shave or not. Being ‘too young’ at the start, I began my hair removal journey with creams. That smelly, stinky stuff – and this was around 1980 – you can only imagine how bad that stuff was back then.
I then graduated to razors and have pretty much had to stick to them ever since. Thirty long years.
But that is not from lack of trying every other affordable way. But to no avail.
The method I wished worked for me, is waxing. I have tried. Many times. But thanks to the substantial dose of exposure to the Aussie sun at the beach, coupled with natural genes, my leg skin has been rendered a tad leathery and has, in turn, made my legs a haven for in-grown hairs. No amount of exfoliation and cream to soften the skin, seem to do the trick when I wax. So it’s shaving or nothing.
The final downer? That if a shave in the morning, I can feel the buggers poking their heads through by late afternoon…OK, a slight exaggeration; but only slightly.
One night in Winter last year, I was shaving my legs in my teeny, awkward shower; balancing precariously on one leg – it’s such a pain. And I felt this pinprick of annoyance, wanting to shout, “Why do I have to do this?” …even though I was in my ‘down time’ of shaving.
(Winter affords me a lovely window where I can let the legs get a bit gorilla-like, as they’re always covered).
So when did this irritating and expensive habit begin?
An article entitled “Caucasian Female Body Hair and American Culture” by Christine Hope, says that:
…businesses began “encouraging” American women to shave their underarms around 1915, when sleeveless fashions became popular. Harper’s Bazaar featured an ad stating: “Summer Dress and Modern Dancing combine to make necessary the removal of objectionable hair.” Yet another revenue stream made possible by human insecurity.
The war against nature’s leg warmers came a bit later, as changes in clothing allowed women to display more than just an ankle. According to Hope, convincing women to shave their legs was more challenging, so advertisers pulled out all the stops. “Some advertisers as well as an increasing number of fashion and beauty writers harped on the idea that female leg hair was a curse.”
A curse? How absurd, right?
Anything to get women to buy…and they do. A recent report I read, claimed women in Australia spend $100, 000 on razors and $30, 000 on waxing – a year.
Insanity.
Secondly, in the big scheme of things – centuries actually – this leg hair removal business is a really recent event; only about 70 year. When I think about all the women in history, who were loved – adored – worshipped…they would have ALL had hairy legs, hairy pits…the works.
All. Of. Them.
Question #82: Isn’t it a shame that so many ‘beauty necessities’ for women, are SO unnecessarily entrenched?
It didn’t seem to bother the men (or the women) of the past.
So am I saying that I’m going to stop shaving my legs?
Hell NO!!
I’m too conditioned and so is the world around me; it’s not a good look with my dark, luscious South American hairs. I have to say, I always envied all my fairer Aussie girlfriends…with their invisible leg hair…
…but the main reason I brought this up, is the mere FRUSTRATION that it’s just another thing we have to spend money on to make ourselves conform to a very recent norm.
My 7 year old daughter recently asked me (with a perplexed expression) why I removed my leg hair and I told her that that’s the way I was brought up but that she doesn’t have to. It probably won’t work because I’m not modelling it – but who knows, if enough girls reject removing their body hair, then it could become the norm just as easily as this one did.
So on I go – with razor in hand…
…Oh, look! A photo of what my legs look like after a few days.
KIDDING! (sort of).
Deep Breath, girls!
x
The Seven Deadly Sins.
August 5, 2012
Question #79: Is our media, and in turn reality, teaching our kids that the only way to ‘succeed’, is by feeding our Deadly Sins?
I look around and I feel surrounded – like I’m in the middle of an old-fashioned, cowboy-style ambush.
* Greed * Lust * Wrath * Sloth * Gluttony * Envy * Pride – transgressions that I read are ‘fatal to spiritual progress’.
They’re everywhere.
WHY?
Yes, they’ve always been around. Of course. The Deadly Sins weren’t written a few years ago in a boardroom – they’re ancient.
I’ve always seen them as a warning – that to indulge in them would lead to chaos. Hell on Earth.
I don’t think we’re quite there yet.
But…
There is one society that is yielding to them more than others…and it’s our capitalist one.
While the majority of the planet wallows in poverty/war/despair of some sort (due to their rulers participating in some Deadly tastes of their own) – we basically live in a luxury that’s unfathomable and unattainable to them.
You’d think we’d be satisfied, wouldn’t you? And yet…according to studies, we are the most affluent we’ve ever been in history – but the most depressed.
Doesn’t this ring any alarm bells?
Our predominant drive? To make money.
Am I saying we shouldn’t? Absolutely not! I could always do with a little more – couldn’t we all? It IS the world we live in – we need it to survive here.
But at what price?
Our society’s hunger for more of everything and the latest of that, is giving me the uneasy feeling that we are starting to flirt with danger.
Not including the majority of ‘have-nots’ equally inhabiting this planet – we are spoilt. And we are few, in comparison to the big picture.
Yet we consume at a pace that is starting to become insatiable and is being bred into this generation of children and young adults.
So as the ‘line to cross’ has to move further behind to get an ‘edge’ on consumption – how is it done today?
By tapping into the taboo, the naughty, the violent, the lazy, the greedy, the depraved…then market it and SELL!
So, yes, I’m starting to feel boxed in by our media and how it’s becoming the teat from which our society suckles – predominantly a pornographic one.
The frustrating part is that I know that there are many, many of you who can see how things are travelling down a soul-less path, as I do; who are doing the very best they can with their children and share my frustration…
…but we’re obviously not enough. We are in the minority.
I can only look at the evidence before my eyes:
1. What I’m seeing in my daily life through (predominantly, but not exclusive to) TV and its ads, Internet, Magazines etc. etc. etc.
2. The choices our youth are making through their behaviour and appearance. Choices that make me question: Where are their parents in this equation?
Today I saw something that chilled me: A book being sold by Amazon (but has since been removed) giving a world guide to sex laws called,
Age of Consent: A Sex Tourists’ Guide
It claims:
“In some countries it is even illegal to have sex outside of marriage, with severe consequences if you are caught doing so! On the flip side, there are many countries on this planet where the age of consent is as low as 12 or 13…whilst one country has no age limit whatsoever! Before travelling, whether you are going as a backpacker, for business purposes, or as a sex tourist, you need to invest in this comprehensive guide to the age of consent laws in every country in the world! It will keep your fun legal!…This $3.49 will keep you out of jail, possibly the most important few dollars that any red blooded testosterone pumped traveller will spend.”
This utterly sickens me – because what I keep questioning is how did something as disgusting as this get printed in the first place? HOW?
Money.
Now, I won’t bore you with a list of how consumption is dancing with the Seven Deadly Sins – but it feels like we’re going down a slippery slope and picking up speed.
There is too much evidence.
How do we slow down this beast/machine, that’s bearing down on us?
Simple. Don’t buy into it!
Those Sins are in all of us – we all feel them at one stage or another…I know I ceratinly have…
Question #80: So why are we allowing them to take over?
The images throughout the post, are of the Seven Deadly Sins from a 2008 ImageFX competition. They uniquely connected with me – I can easily see how these are very present in our lives. The curious thing, however, is that when I looked for images on the Net – they predominantly featured women only. Interesting.
Deep Breath.
x
Just look at this image…
July 20, 2012
Lily Munroe – a friend I have made through this blog (and has a like-minded blog herself: freedomfrompornculture) – found the following, A-MAZ-ING image, after reading my last post:
Question #76: Do you think this is what’s happening?
I do…
and I’m finding myself getting a little alarmed.
Deep Breath.
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Questions for Us 