Feminist Shout Out! #1
February 17, 2012
I’m going to announce a Feminist Shout Out every time I put an observation that I think may not be your cup of tea…but I’m going to QUESTION it, anyway. I really hope you can let me know your thoughts – whatever they may be. Let’s talk. We can’t rely on our male-run governments to make all the decisions. Let’s make some here.
Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi (D-California) is sending around this photo from the hearing on birth control today. She writes: “At @GOPOversight hearing right now 5 men are testifying on women’s health: http://yfrog.com/10wg35j #WhereAreTheWomen?”
Yes, WHERE? ? ?
Tonight, I walked in to find a movie on the TV about the Bra Boys (a surfing gang). I’m not really watching, but I look up and see violence – boys fighting boys, men fighting men. And it’s not Hollywood fighting, where the injuries don’t reflect what’s been done to them, but ugly, bloody, VICIOUS fighting. It was shocking to watch actual footage of the fights – because they were real. A 14 yr old member tells how he had a gun put down his throat, over him selling Ecstasy and other horrific accounts. 14.
AND THIS IS WHAT OUR WORLD IS.
Men fighting men. Men being violent with each other, demonstrating what seems to be the ONLY way to globally solve problems thus far – except they’re NEVER solved and create SUCH devastation – and they’re violent towards women. Most of us are lucky enough to have loving male partners, but look at how women are being violently treated by the MILLIONS every single day.
As Dr Phil says, “How’s that workin’ for ya?”
We vote men in. WHY? We need a different dynamic in our governments – we need A LOT more women in government, girls MUST be educated worldwide – they will tip the world back into balance. Instead of financing wars, let’s finance education.
But it’s still just about being in power and making an astronomical amount of money. Qantas will axe jobs to keep their SHAREHOLDERS happy. One man has a family to feed and has just lost his job – while the other makes a mint….but he’ll just make less of a mint. Yep, let’s side with the guy that already HAS a lot of money.
Our world is a boys’ club.
Is this OK with you?
We still don’t have equal pay, all the major corporations in the world are run by men, and our young girls AND boys are being corrupted to satisfy the male fantasy – to make money. More people are becoming morally corrupted and we’re allowing this lesson to be present in our children’s pop culture. They’re becoming consuming monsters and they’re consuming over-sexualised girls, violent, bullying boys – with girls who think that’s ok etc. etc…and this is just in the developed world.
The women in the developing countries are suffering atrocities we can barely imagine and they NEED OUR HELP. We need to educate their girls so they can STAND UP and start to create change.
We need to create change – from our end. We must get women into government. It starts here – in Australia. It’s inconceivable that we continue to follow The US. That place is a cesspool of greed, gluttony and porn. And men run that country. That’s not saying there aren’t good people there – I’m sure they’ll follow us once we take the lead! We start here because we are intelligent and we know that it’s time to make our calm but persistent voice heard.
Calm and Persistent Voice.
Stop buying from shops, like City Beach, for selling pornographic products aimed at children (for example). Let them know you’re not shopping there anymore through their Facebook page – most have them. Money talks. Sometimes they listen – because they’re losing money. Let’s put our money to good use, rather than feed the monster, and be happy.
Get women into government.
I have a proposal: Vote women in from the party of your choice. There’s always going to be debate – but our current parliament meetings are run like men – fighting and insulting each other. WHAT IS THE POINT? Let’s just do it!
What have we got to lose?
Question #17: WHAT SAY YOU?
Please pass this on. With much hope. x
Some funny self reflection…
February 17, 2012
I want you to come on a small journey and see some of the ‘demons’ I face with my appearance – being a woman.
Sometimes when I’m on the phone, I have to escape the kids and hide away in my bedroom – to be able to have a conversation in peace –“Muuuuumm”. Many times, I catch sight of myself in my bedroom mirror, and when the lighting is juuust right…I see a crone. Yep, a crone. *recoil and scrunch up face – stop it, that’s more lines!*
When did I get so old? Let’s see what other things I see…
Now, I have good legs – but what’s that droopy sort of skin above each knee that seems to want to start heading south all of a sudden? Is there any such thing as a knee lift? *smirk* I would never get one – but was actually wondering…
I’ve had humans exit my body – as most women I know have – and we all have to carry around that lovely added extra around the stomach. Like growing said human and have it come out, wasn’t ‘reward’ enough! And who can forget that charming phrase “muffin top”, that seemed to be a regular word tossed around at Mothers’ Group. Are guys refered to as having muffin tops?
“Nine months to put on, nine months to take off, ladies!” Jeez, the pressure! I always felt a secret resentment of any article that pointed out how quickly a star took off the baby weight, 10 minutes after giving birth, stating the marvels of breast feeding. What-EVA! She who has a personal trainer and chef at their disposal. My first baby sucked my milk like a crazy person and it actually made me eat MORE, than when I was actually pregnant…couldn’t help it…my body thought I was still eating for two. I felt jipped.
There’s the little flap of skin that’s appeared under my chin. Has anyone else got that? How quickly is that one going to progress? I don’t want to look like turkey anytime soon, thank you very much…and yet – there it is.
Boobs. What can I say. I remember watching the series, ‘Mad About You’ (loved that show) and there was this great sequence of scenes, when the lead character, Jamie, was in labour. All the women in her life were sitting in her hospital room with her, as her husband wasn’t there yet. They were giving out advice when the issue of breasts came up. Her mother said to her, “You’ll be fuller breasted, dear.” She nods. Her sister-in-law then states factually, “Yes, but eventually they look like a couple of empty gym socks.” Hahaha! Classic. Well, I won’t say mine are a couple of empty gym socks just yet, but they do like to look at my feet more often – when ‘unassisted’. *wink*
Finally, my hair. I’ve had long hair my whole adult life, but an accident at the hairdressers saw that change a few months ago. I went in for a trim with a few long layers. What actually happened was my hair ended up being hacked with a plethora of instruments, including a razor, and ended up looking like Carol Brady with a mullet. So bad. The only solution was to cut off the mullet – and ended up with short hair. I don’t mind it BUT I didn’t want to look like a woman who had made that, “Oh, I’m over forty now, so I better cut a mummy haircut”, decision. Plus it looks the same every day. I miss my ponytail. But then, everyone has long hair. Do I grow it?
So here’s my comparison with guys – I’m pretty sure they don’t agonise over their appearance as much as we do, because we love them anyway. They can put on weight, lose their hair, get very wrinkley – it’s the common image in the media – men can look however they like and will always be accepted.
And our guys love us too, when we start to get out of shape and grow older – don’t they? I guess that on the whole they do, BUT I know of a few stories within my circle of friends where the male partner has left, for a younger woman. If I know a few – surely you know a few. Therefore, is it more common than we think? Can we say the same of women who leave their men for younger versions? Probably not. I think that, even though I can look good for my age – a younger guy would see the middle-aged oldie I really am.
Hey, that’s OK – I don’t need that validation from younger men – as I’m sure you don’t either (only women in the public eye seem to be butchering themselves to look ‘younger’) – but what is it with us?
Question #16: Why are women SO obsessed with looking younger? Can’t we just reward each other for looking the best we can for our age?
Defending the undefendable.
February 14, 2012
Just a short post.
I hope everybody had a lovely Valentines’ Day, but more importantly, I hope some of you remembered that today was V-Day; a day when we remember our less fortunate sisters from around the globe, experiencing violence and the loss of their human rights – and not just in war-torn countries in Africa, but in our very own ‘developed’ world too.
I find it amazing that there will always be a defence for violence against women. I ‘m sure we’re all on the same page, when I say that I’m raising my daughters to understand that there’s NEVER a reason to hit. Ever.
So the male excuse, “She asked for it”, makes me livid. “Thank you sir, may I have another.” I don’t think so.
Here is a post about Chris Brown (who hit Rhianna). Now I’m not a massive fan of hers – but that is irrelevant. Noone, NOONE deserves to be hit.
http://www.mamamia.com.au/entertainment/chris-brown-performing-at-the-grammys-is-not-okay/
Question #15: Why do women, as well as men, defend male inflicted violence against women?
A night with Eve Ensler.
February 13, 2012
On a whim, a colleague of mine and I found ourselves getting tickets to see Eve Ensler speak about human rights – more specifically, women’s rights.
She’s an American playwright who most famously wrote, ‘The Vagina Monologues’ but more importantly, she’s an activist for women’s human rights world-wide.
She was introduced as a warrior. How wonderful.
And she was. The horrific statistics and stories that she told about the raping, assaulting, stoning, burning, sex trafficking, genital mutilating and so on, of women around the world, right now, left us stunned – it was like the audience was holding its breath. As I listened, I knew that women were suffering worldwide, but not at this catastrophic level – a place we’ve never been at before. A sense of hopelessness took hold.
Nevertheless, I left inspired and with a fire in my belly – because there was also joy in some of her stories…and FIGHT. *Just look a deep breath*
She talked about having a voice. And that’s the answer. Women need to learn, observe, express and QUESTION the world around them – a world where women are not exploited and are equal in Every. Single. Way.
This is impossible without women using their voice. This blog is my voice.
The icing on the cake, for me, is that Eve’s a playwright, who has seen how healing it is when women watch theatre and learn the wonder of free expression. She inspires women who have been through the unimaginable, to start to create change by saying and doing what they can – to stop it from happening to anybody else. And they succeed.
Eve started V-Day, which is actually tomorrow – Valentines’ Day. V- Day is to finally STOP violence against women. Clink on the link below and join the movement because 1 in 3 women worldwide will be beaten or raped in their lifetime. That’s worldwide and it’s a deeply embedded practice.
http://www.vday.org/onebillionrisingpage.html
This movement also knows that there are countless men, who want to stand together with their daughters, sisters, aunts, mothers and grandmothers and join the ‘choir’.
She also opened ‘The City of Joy’ – a place for countless women to go to, who have been victims of rape in the Republic of Congo.
Eve not only walks the walk, she talks the talk. We need to follow suit.
Eve’s latest book is a collection of stories about young women from around the world. Some are fictitious and others aren’t – but they represent a rainbow of young women. It’s called, ‘I’m an Emotional Creature’ and this is an excerpt from Eve’s introduction:
When I was your age, I didn’t know how to live as an emotional creature. I felt like an alien. I still do a lot of the time. I don’t think it has much to do with the country I grew up in or the language I speak. In this book you will meet girls from everywhere.
Some live in remote villages, others in huge cities or posh suburbs. Some worrying about whether they will be able to afford the latest purple UGGs, some worrying if they’ll ever get home after two years of being held as a sex slave. Some deciding whether they are able to kill a supposed enemy, some on the brink of killing themselves, some desperate for the next meal, some unable to stop starving themselves.
Girls from Cairo, Kwai Yong, Sofia, Ramallah, Bukavu, Narok, Westchester, Jerusalem, Manhattan, Paris. All of them, all of you, live on the planet right now. I think whatever country or town or village you physically live in, you inhabit a similar emotional landscape. You all come from girl land. There you get born with this awakeness, this open-hearted, have to eat it, taste it, know it, defy it.
Then the ‘grown-ups’ come with their rules, their directions. They teach you how to make yourselves less, so everyone feels more comfortable. They teach you not to stand out. They get you to behave.
I am older now. I finally know the difference between pleasing and loving, obeying and respecting. It has taken me so many years to be okay withe being different, with being this alive, this intense. I just don’t want you to have to wait that long.
Love, Eve
Question #14: Are you with me ladies? Do you have something to say?
Beautiful new icon
February 12, 2012
Hey gorgeous girls *grinning*
I have a new image for this blog, that I think reflects how I see it all:
It’s mother-earthy; it’s peaceful; it’s all women and it’s simply beautiful. It’s called ‘Hope II’ and the artist is Gustav Klimt.
I recently got a notebook, where I now jot down any ideas and observations I have for this blog. I bought it in a quirky shop in Katoomba, The Blue Mountains.
The cover is a Klimt painting – the image is of two faces – a mother holding her nestling child; both breathing each other in.
I was drawn to it because, not only is it stunning, the child looks like my eldest girl when she was a baby (lots of dark hair when she was born) AND my youngest, because she’s fair and looks like the cover babe when she sleeps.
I love it.
I first learned about Klimt (and his gold paint) through my sister, an amazing artist herself, because one of her favourite paintings was always, ‘The Kiss’.
I was busting to know the name of the painting on my beautiful notebook…and there I made a very poignant discovery. The image of my slumbering mother and babe were only part of a bigger picture – a painting called, ‘The Three Stages of Woman’.
How poignant indeed.
Look at the image of the third stage? Next to the vibrance of the first two stages, what a depressing and bleak view of the old woman – something that appears sadly inevitable and unavoidable – and also encapsulates what we women seem to feel about getting older.
Klimt captured this perception in 1905 – what was he seeing? Better question is:
Question #13: Is this painting a representation of how men see us when we’re old or is it how we see ourselves?
1905.
Let’s start at the very beginning…*Black Comedy included…
February 10, 2012
Where does it begin?
In my Year 7 class yesterday, we were discussing the different ways in which we communicate. In relation to their writing, I was explaining that if their brain gets used to typing ur instead of your, they’ll occasionally slip and write it the wrong way when they’re at school. A female student explained that when you’re chatting you need to do it quickly so that the other person doesn’t think you’ve left the conversation. At this point, a boy in the class calls out, “Or maybe they just think you’re fat.”
I was momentarily speechless (and for those who know me, that’s an uncommon occurrence).
There were a few things that didn’t sit right with me. The obvious one was that he managed to slip that irrelevant comment in, without thought for the girl he was talking to, but the most surprising part was that nobody in the class flinched or seemed to be overly concerned.
How did our kids become so desensitised at such a young age?
I made it very clear to this boy and the rest of the class, that that sort of comment is completely unacceptable.
So, how early are girls being initiated into the world classroom, where the lesson taught is, “Your worth is in your looks”?
I know that this is not the experience of every girl – but there’s a TV show (of course) that they can watch, where the subliminal messaging begins.
Three words: Toddlers. And. Tiaras.
The fact that the word ‘Toddler’ is in the title, just disturbs my core.
Now, I have only ever seen part of an episode, which I used for one of my Drama classes, and all I have to say is,
I – don’t – get – it.
Granted, I don’t know how it all works – for example, does every girl get a trophy? (there seem to be a lot). If that’s the case, then that would make it a pointless competition
….and there it is – the word COMPETITION.
Looks are fleeting. One day one may be deemed beautiful, the next one is not.
Then what?
What does a little 5 yr old feel when she’s told she’s not the prettiest?
Enter her again? And again?
What lesson is she gaining? That people will only truly love her when she’s dressed up and spray tanned to within an inch of her life? Dancing provocatively to adults?
I don’t get it.
Isn’t this a win for paedophiles? Seriously, they can access images like the following off Google. Why are parents (especially mothers) encouraging and exposing their babies in this way?
This most famous toddler star (who I saw doing pelvic thrusts on Sunrise when she was in Australia) is also being Photoshopped. Photoshopped! I found some other images of different girls, where the eyes have been made MUCH bigger, and together with the airbrushed skin, it made them look weird.
Why does the image on the left (below) need to be Photoshopped in the first place?
I have so many questions because there is no logic to this madness. I can’t even fathom the damage this would do to a person of ANY age – being told in a beauty pageant that they’re not beautiful – let alone with these young developing minds.
FUNNY PART
Let’s watch some satire.
The following link is very funny.
It’s Tom Hanks giving a satirical look at the ridiculousness of all this.
Now that you’ve had a laugh – riddle me this:
Question #12: What do mothers hope their daughters gain, from being subjected to this kind of ‘competition’?
Dirty dancing…and it ain’t with Patrick Swayze.
February 6, 2012
The following article appeared in the paper yesterday – a perfect follow-on to my last post.
It hits the nail on the head.
How have we allowed the music industry to portray women in such a soulless demeaning way?
OK. Do you agree?
I’m going to go down Nostalgia Avenue again – Sorry, I can’t help it…
Music and I have always had a close love affair. My earliest memories were of my best friend, Katy, and I preparing endless dance routines in her living room. It had a perfectly placed mirror to be able to watch the ‘magic’ unfold – our best work being a fabulously choreographed number to ‘Copacobana!’
Our dance moves were heavily steeped in 70s disco influences…and we looked fantastic! This music love affair continued with the birth of the walkman – a device I HAD to have. Music everywhere I went? How wonderful! In Year 11, I worked in a chicken shop (called ‘The Game Cock’….I kid you not), to pay for said walkman. My Duran Duran cassettes certainly got a work out…
At this time, music videos really took off. Of course there were music videos before, but they started to take on a new life – it wasn’t just an artist standing in front of a microphone and singing; stories started to be told through the videos.
I LOVED it. There was nothing like watching Countdown on a Sunday night (the cause for GREAT conversation on the bus the next day) or Sounds on a Saturday morning. I remember the pure excitement of waiting for the premier showing of a video….it was simply awesome….*sigh*
Now, I don’t think I sound the same as parents of the day, shielding their burning eyes from the thrusting pelvis of a certain Elvis Presley – I actually love some dance music, House in particular – really love them. I do, however, feel that things have definitely gone down a dark road for women in music videos. The worst part is that many women artists are perpetuating this image.
Pussycat Dolls – enough said. I always felt that they sent out very confusing messages to women – not needing a man being the main message in one song, to tormenting a boy whose girlfriend is not “hot” like her (or a “freak” like her), to practically begging a man to “loosen up her buttons”. But one thing always stayed the same – their videos were like soft porn.
On a different branch, one of the things I feel most disappointed with, is the fact that female artists that made it BIG being ‘wholesome’ and gained a very large, young fan base, all turned to soft porn to sell more albums. The unfortunate part, is that as they were watching the older market of consumers they could ensnare to buy their music (with means that had nothing to do with music), they turned their backs on the young ones, who continued to watch…and learn.
The first words of Christina Aguilera’s song ‘Dirty’ are of a man saying, “Dirty, Filthy, Nasty.” There’s that word again – dirty.
The accompanying video was just what they guys wanted to see – Christina in a dark and dingy boxing ring being cheered on by beefy men, as she danced as though she were in a strip show…I don’t really think it was for us. This was at a time when all of this was starting to warm up.
Here’s a shot of her from around the same time.
Of course there was also Britney – she who performed a lap dance every night of her last world tour, to a male audience member (amongst other things):
Both these women have sons. They will ALWAYS be able to access images of their mothers in this way….forever. It’s such a shame that the allure of more money took precedence over anything else. I wonder if they regret it, now that they’re mothers.
So, there are still music videos on a Saturday morning – but my daughters can’t watch them. Which is a real BUMMER. I want my girls and their future ‘Katy’ dancing to great songs in the living room.
I would love to think that there is a way to make a change with this.
Question #11: How is change possible, when women are helping perpetuate the soft porn image in their videos?
Growing up…’80s style.
February 3, 2012
In 1985, I was 15 years old. A pure ’80s teen.
I can’t help but smile at the tragic elements that made the ’80s so unique…and how I love them so. For all the Aussie readers, I was watching Rage the other night and they’re going through a retro stage, by playing countless episodes of Countdown – from the mid ’80s. MOST excellent! As I watched, I couldn’t help but cack at what the audience looked like. Classic!
There were lots of girls wearing baggy jeans, that came in a bit at the ankle (mmMMmm), with bunched up white socks, lace up shoes (think Duran Duran….my idols!), baggy shirts and big bows in their hair. Noice.
From memory, there were also the shoulder pads, tube skirts, odd hair-cuts (long on one side, short on the other – as well as the classic massive, teased fringe or spiky numbers), big shirts with a belt over the top, fingerless gloves, flouros, pastels, paisley, tartan, bubble dresses….aaaahh, good times. I can literally see the younger readers flinching…and you’d be right to…because on the whole, it was a baggy look…and we looked like dags. *still grinning*
Fortunately for us – it was the fashion. It was ‘in’.
Please cast your eyes on the wonderful specimen I was in 1984, at the Year 9 dance – my first ever dance with boys:
There is a white TIE at the front of this fabulous outfit….that I wore to attract a male of the spiecies (no luck, though – Ha!). Please also note the girls in the background with their full, long skirts. Imagine a Yr 9 dance today – what would the girls be wearing? Mmmm….exactly.
So, on this Countdown episode, Howard Jones is up and starts to lip-sync (as they all did back then) to his song:
“I’d like to get to know you well…I’d like to get to know you well…I’d like to get to know you well, so we can one, we can be one, to-gether.” (Remember that one?)
So as I’m watching him, with his long shirt, teased hair and excellent lip-syncing skills, surrounded by all those daggy audience members, I start to smile because they really do seem like more innocent times.
But not on the inside – it was the same hormones, same wants – just not so transparent and ‘in your face’.
I suppose the realisation I had, was that the music lyrics and videos of the 80’s were endearing because it was ‘tongue-in-cheek’. We all knew, like a ‘secret club’, what the lyrics were really about. Younger kids would be oblivious, because the video clips didn’t match what was being sung. I remember Cindy Lauper had a song called, “She Bop”. Now at the time, the word around the school yard was that the song was about masturbation (oooOOooo – so naughty *wink*) – but the video clip featured her in a suit, with a top hat and tails. It kind of felt a bit grown up to be part of the secret club – my younger sister certainly had NO idea what the song was about.
So what do we have today?
Well, about five years ago, I remember there was a VERY popular song on the radio that had a lot of the words beeped out (Eminem *gag* was one of the singers). I did remember the line, “I wanna girl who will do whatever the *beep* I say, every day she’ll be giving it up.”
Nice. Classy. So I looked the lyrics up and this is a sample of it:
[Eminem]
Get buzzed, get drunk, get crunked, get fuuucked up
Hit the strip club, don’t forget ones, get your dick rubbed
Get fucked, get sucked, get wasted, shit faceded, pasted
Plastered, puke drink up get a new drink
Leave the bathroom sink [puke], wipe your shoe clean got a routine goin’
Still got a few chunks on them shoe strings shoin’
I was dehydrated till the beat vibrated
I was revived as soon as this bitch giyrated
Them hips and lickin’ lips and that was it
I had to get Nate Dogg here to sing some shit
[Nate Dogg]
Were gonna have a party, turn the music up
Let’s get it started, go ahead shake ya butt
I’m lookin for a girl with a body and sexy strip
Wanna get it poppin’ baby step right up
Some girls they act retarded, some girls about it bout it
I’m lookin for a girl that will do whatever the fuck
I say everyday she be givin’ it up
[Eminem]
I’m a menace, a dentist, an oral hygienist
Open your mouth for about four or five minutes
Take a little bit of this fluoride rinse
Swish but don’t spit it, swallow and now finish, Yeahhh!
Me and Nate D-O-Double G lookin for a couple Bitches
With some Double D’s pop a little chapagne and a couple E’s
Slip it in her bubbly, wheee fittin ta have a party [Nate Dogg]
Were gonna have a party, turn the music up
Let’s get it started, go ahead shake ya butt
I’m lookin for a girl I can fuck in my Hummer truck
Apple bottom jeans and a big ol suck
Some girls they act retarded, some girls are bout it bout it
I want a bitch that sit at the crib with no panties on
Knows that she can but she won’t say no
Now look at this lady all in front of me, sexy as can be
Tonight I want a SLUT, would you be mine?
I Heard you was freaky from a friend of mine
I mean seriously. They’re singing about drugging girls in one line, amongst the rest of its hideousness. Could young men hear this and think that’s the way it is – or worse still, the way it should be? Surely, the answer to that must be YES. They’re singing it in a song on the radio, aren’t they?
Now we have the women joining in, singing songs that sound like soft porn (how else are they going to make money, if it’s not to sell themselves short?) Why would a guy want to call a 0055 number, when he can turn on a popular radio station or go into any shop that plays the music and hear a girl moaning and singing, “I like it when you lick me there”? (I heard this one recently).
So couple this sort of music, with their corresponding video clips and hyper-sexualised women and surely you start to mould a generation.
Where’s the ‘secret club’ gone?
Question #10: How can we combat the influence of the current paradigm of music and their videos?
The Kardashians – a representation of what’s wrong today.
January 31, 2012
If there is a group of women who have been wrapped up in plastic packaging, sold to the world and subsequently gained unfathomable wealth – it’s the Kardashians.
I find it infuriating and a complete enigma, that these women are given a pedestal in our society for being ‘savvy business women’, but who are in fact being rewarded for their uselessness.
On a recent report, when Kim and one of the other coat-tail sisters came to Sydney, it claimed that the Kardashians made 70 million dollars the previous year. 70.million.dollars.
How is this possible? What is it they contribute to society to justify such wealth?
Let’s see…
# 1: Kim became ‘famous’ from a sex tape, which was conveniently leaked just before the start of their first season of ‘Keeping up with the Kardashians.’
#2: As the family demonstrate nothing but their insatiable appetite for money and fame – we respond by giving it to them.
#3: Now they slap a label on and sell everything, including themselves. The same report claimed Kim asks for $150,000 an hour to make an appearance at an event.
With all that money, they can only swim laps in their greed – a greed on such a grand scale, that we seem (as a society) to admire it and reward it.
Isn’t Greed one of the Seven Deadly Sins?
The worst part is that rather than have some substantially significant impact on the world with that wealth, they just spend it all on their gross vanity – clothes, cars, a nip and a tuck – only further pushing young girls to revere a falsehood.
Here’s a picture of Kim crying…
In my Drama class yesterday, we were talking about how hard it is to laugh and cry convincingly when acting. When we were dissecting what makes a good cry, we agreed that there’s one common denominator – you look ugly….really ugly. That’s what a cry is. The image above shows a frozen face. Cover the mouth – she could be expressing ANY other emotion – because that top part ain’t moving.
What are these women, predominantly Kim, teaching to our girls?
This is where I’m stumped.
When the two sisters came to Sydney, the news reports showed gaggles, flocks, SCORES of young women and girls, going to shriek greet them. It was like the Beatles were in town.
Seriously.
On two separate news reports, hysterical (I kid you not) girls were asked what they loved about Kim. They both responded with equally breathless, squeals of, “She’s…SO BEAUTIFUL!!” When asked what else they liked, the reporters should have run the audio of the crickets chirping in the background because they had no other answer. None. One girl kept looking around, trying to think of something inspirational to say – probably hoping someone would feed her the answer…any answer.
Zip.
So there you have it – she’s beautiful. Fake beautiful. 70 million dollars.
Now we can feel relieved to know that our girls will now know exactly what they need to do – what to aspire to – to make money. And it all starts with selling themselves; selling themselves short.
Forget educating our girls – giving them a mind to make change – it’s all for nothing if all that’s important (regardless of what she’s achieved) is how she looks; sexy, hot and fake.
And that’s the message saturating our children’s world.
Boys used to have to sneak a magazine (that would have possibly been a little difficult to get), to see a bit of boob – now both boys and girls can simply to go to the shops because now we’re selling jeans like this:
Thanks girls. You look hot. I hope you got the validation you were looking for.
Question #9: Have these sorts of women become our girls’ new role models?
Warning – use of strong language.
January 28, 2012
A few months ago, I was on school holidays and flicking through some daytime TV. I happened to land on the ABC and saw Gail Dines doing a presentation to what looked like some MPs or equivalent.
She was showing how women are now, more commonly, being repreaented. Nothing really surprising. Then she made the following – what I thought was an ‘a-ha’ – point:
She was showing an image of a woman on the cover of Sports Illustrated looking….well you can imagine – and she said, “We all know what she (the woman on the cover) is trying to communicate, don’t we? The ‘Fuck me’ look.” Yep, that’s it.
She said that when she discusses the topic with senior high school students, they come up with the same – no mystery there. She then asks the students if any of them can get up and demonstrate the look. Of course, there are always girls who volunteer.
However, when she asks a boy to do it, she gets a different demonstration – because when a guy does the ‘Fuck me’ look, everyone, including himself, start to laugh. Why? Because it looks silly – as Gail explains, guy can’t do the ‘Fuck me’ look – he does the ‘Fuck you’ look.
Yes.
Yes.
Think about the common way in which our young adults, teens and now children are being depicted. Isn’t what she’s saying right?
I feel like, if we boil it all down, the simple message is that a female is nothing unless she’s seen as ‘Fuckable.’
This is the moment I need to interject my own argument – to make sure we’re on the same page (or not).
I don’t have a problem with a woman being sexual – we are sexual beings. I believe a woman – every woman – has it in her to be attractive + confident and intelligent. But in this ever stifling pop culture, where can our sons and daughters see this modelled?
Again, I’m talking about BALANCE – something I’ll keep referring to because it’s not so much what’s out there (to a degree it’s always been ‘out there’), but where’s the yin to complement the yang?
I don’t know if you watch regular TV, (I don’t have cable – just the free-to-air stuff), but The Good Wife ad has caught my attention. It saddens me that – beside the fact that some of the main female stars look like they’ve gone under the knife a few times – it seems nearly irrelevant that the ‘good’ wife is a lawyer. The WHOLE ad campaign leading up to the new season has her main photo in lingerie, there’s a sexy shot of her on a bed, with raunchy music playing throughout, and the slogan, “Don’t let the name fool you” – obviously…because she’s a naughty, naughty girl.
Now she’s fuckable. Well, that’s a relief!
Here are some promo shots from the show. Here is Julianna showing how her character NOW has strength and won’t be a door mat. What, by performing sexual favours?
Another female character, ironically also speaks about being a ‘badass’…in her over-the-knee leather boots, short mini leather skirt and VERY tight shirt.
The MEN however….Same job and yet, there’s a tired weariness in that first shot – hard day at work ending with a well deserved whiskey – plus the fact they’re all fully dressed in the suits they would actually wear to work.
Why are the women not wearing what they would actually wear to the office in these shots??
Should our daughters watch it and get inspired because she’s also a lawyer? Maybe. But there doesn’t seem to be a hell of a lot of choice – after all, there’s also stupid and fuckable.
The saturation of this simple, subliminal, messaging in popular media means that we are ALL being subjected to it – regardless of age. After all, my interest in discussing this show ONLY came from one ad campaign. As we go on with our lives, in the background there is an incessant drone, telling us over and over again, through these representations, that a woman’s worth is whether she’s ‘Fuckable’ and a man learns that this is what he has to look out for. This is incredibly limiting.
Question #8: Do you think that it’s OK for women to be portrayed in this manner?
If you hadn’t noticed, start paying attention to the limited blueprints that are being delivered to you about women and girls, and how the same message wallpapers us in outdoor advertising and narratives.
Nothing can change unless we wake up as a society and stop consuming what we’re given without critical reflection.
Questions for Us 